I’m currently reading The Brain That Changes Itself by Norman Doidge. (It’s a surprisingly easy read given the scientific nature of the subject.) The book focuses on explaining the concept of neuroplasticity, or brain’s ability to reorganize itself. Using stories and anecdotes, Doidge illustrates that our minds have a far greater capacity for change than we are aware.

Though it takes considerable effort, our brains have the potential to overcome major neurological issues. For example, our brains have the adaptive potential to recover use of affected limbs after a stroke or learn new motor skills after a life time of cerebral palsy, something once considered impossible. If the individual brain is capable of accomplishing such feats, how amazing would it be if we could make a societal shift towards the mere act of thinking differently?

The average person is extraordinarily attached to their way of thinking. Issues like political parties, religious beliefs, and values are deeply entrenched emotionally. I’m not saying that values should be plastic; indeed, you could argue quite the opposite. But people’s willingness to EXAMINE their values should be fluid and flexible. Adherence is fine, but adherence without analyzing the other side of the issue and without truly understanding what you profess to believe is ignorance.

Perhaps it’s just election season, but I’m tired of watching a country full of people who are absolutely convinced they’re right. How much greater would debate be if more of us stopped spewing ideological rhetoric and started actually examining both sides of the issue?

Neuroplasticity is a proven phenomenon. Possessing the emotional plasticity to willingly explore ideas is far from common.

“The test of a first-rate intelligence is the ability to hold two opposed ideas in the mind at the same time, and still retain the ability to function.” -F. Scott Fitzgerald

Yesterday, I went to Subway and ran into a girl who was clearly on her way to cheerleading practice. I was glad that she obviously felt the need to disassociate herself from me because I liked the quote on the back of her shirt.

“It’s not about the will to win - everyone has that. It’s the will to prepare to win that matters.”

I’m guessing this wasn’t an original thought, but thank you anyway, young cheerleader, for providing today’s inspiration.

For your reading pleasure, a few short poems about my encounters with random people in the city.

The hippie on the train
Birkenstocks and socks,
Short shorts expose pale white thighs,
Frizzy ponytail.

Woman in a power suit at Starbucks who refuses to take off her sunglasses despite being indoors
“Double shot latte.”
(Obviously self-absorbed)
“Skim milk only please.”

The homeless people on the free downtown bus talking about how a meth trip made them horny
Crap! When’s the next stop?
I need to get off this bus!
Don’t make eye contact…

The guy who works at the sandwich shop
Confident swagger.
You seem nice enough. But, dude!
Please don’t call me “hun.”

To the teenagers “making a statement”
If you purchased it
from Hot Topic at the mall:
it’s not rebellion.

I just found a hair that didn’t belong to me in my key lime pie. In such disappointing, waste-of-dessert situations like these, I find it helpful to think on the bright side of things.

At least I got to have a few bites before I found the hair. At least I didn’t eat the hair. At least the hair was obviously from a head. And at least I don’t routinely encounter hairs that are not from a head. At least I don’t work as a bikini waxer. Or an obstetrician. Or a janitor at an adult movie theater.

Yep, things are looking up.

I haven’t written a blog post in about a month (actually, that’s a lie. I wrote one and wordpress deleted it before it was published it and I was too irritated to rewrite it…) and have written a grand total of three posts since April. Usually, I would offer some kind of apology and a promise to be more diligent in the future. I’m not feeling that today. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about unproductive emotions and I’ve realized that my self-imposed guilt is one thing that needs to go. So no guilt, just an update about how I’ve lived my life outside of the internet realm.

Something slightly less than employment

I spent most of April and all of May putting in some major hours at work. That’s the old news. The new news is that my company informed me in mid-June that they’ve decided to close down their Denver branch. When people ask me how I’m doing, my automatic response is usually along the lines of “it took me a bit to get over the shock, but now I’m fine.” This is partially a lie. I am fine, but the shock still hits me every morning on the way into work. It has largely turned from a self-centered “I can’t believe they dropped me the day after we finished our project, of which I poured heart and soul and about 500 of hours into” to “I can’t believe how incredibly gracious, composed, and wonderful my co-workers have been throughout this process.” By comparison, I have it easy. I have no family to take care of, I have no major fixed expenses (this is one of the few times in life one can feel smug about their decision to live at home… :), entry level jobs are still an option for me, and I’ve only been with the company for 10 months as opposed to 20+ years. I still have moments when I get a little indignant, but it’s now on behalf of other people who deserved better. But deserve is another one of those unproductive emotions because it’s a perspective that’s rarely reciprocated.

And while I am excited to try something new, I am terribly overwhelmed by the prospect of job hunting. I’m looking forward to finding a job I am more passionate about and preferably an employer that is not so exacting in its required hours. I still have a month or so to figure out what I’m doing next. There is some fear. There is frustration - I hate doing things on other people’s terms, and it turns out leaving a company is no exception. There is relief and a sense of possibility. Above all, there is change. And no matter what I feel or want, it is this that I’ve come to accept. Everything else will come with time.

Family Vacation

I had already planned a vacation for the week of the 4th of July and it seemed the trip would be a much-needed escape from ‘reality.’ I was fortunate enough to spend a fantastic week clearing my head and remembering what’s supposed to be important. Things like sunrises, the ocean lapping at your feet, sandcastles, family dinners, and a kayaking misadventure that will certainly become our family’s epic vacation story for years to come. Being in love with life, drinking in the scenery, and spending time with the people you love - why was I excluding these things from my daily version of ‘reality’? I realized that ever since college graduation, I have associated ‘the real world’ with drudgery. How sad is that? I think this is the very definition of an unproductive emotion, or at least an unproductive perspective. I refuse to accept that my life will be long, draining days, and I’m changing my reality. I am looking forward to a real world full of happiness, love, and daily adventures.

Best of all, I got to feel my first little niece kick. If that doesn’t put things in perspective, I don’t know what does.